Now, Im Pissed!!!!

OK, I am now pissed. Not happy. There are 3 phases to my exercise program with my personal trainer. Foundation, Build and then BURN. Like the name says, the Burn phase is where you burn the most fat. So right now I am in the foundation phase, STILL. I should have moved on to the build for a couple weeks now. Why haven't I move there yet, you wonder??? Well I have a bad knee that prevents me from doing lunges. Even though I am seeing a Physiotherapist, the knee is not getting much better. lunges are according to my trainer a key movement to the program. I do some one day then the pain comes back and then I'm a couple weeks behind. So I was telling my trainer today how frustrated I am. I don't understand why we are not at least starting the Build phase for the upper body. To me it is her job to find other type of exercise that will achieve similar results. What if I never get to do proper lunges??? Am I never going to get to the next phase? The reason I paid so much money is not only to get help doing exercise, get healthier, bla bla bla but to LOSE Weight!!!!! So now I'm back at icing my knee tonight. I pushed a bit more tonight to do these stupid lunges to the detriment of my knee . I hate not succeeding! I'm not sure which approach to take??? This is also ruining my relationship with my personal trainer which to me is very important to make this program successful. It will be otherwise to easy to cancel my appointments with her. I'm not sure what to think!!!

I AM doing it!!!!

Today is Saturday...and guess what I will be doing instead of sitting on the couch all morning???I'm actually gonna drive 1 hour to get to the gym for a 1h30 training. Yep on a Saturday AND Sunday. I'm even kind of looking forward to it :-) I have not posted in while...I had lost a bit of that initial motivation that I get when I start a new project. But I think I'm back on track. What a difference it makes to have a personal trainer...I recommend it. It makes me accountable. If I would be alone, it would be soooo easy to cancel the plans I had made with myself. But when you have someone actually waiting for you, expecting you, it's a bit harder to disappoint. Its very very expensive, but who can put a price on your well-being? But again, the results I get all depends on the effort I put into it, how committed I am and how well I eat. I need a little more efforts on the days I don't go to the gym and watch how I eat on week-ends and evening. You must from times to times evaluate where you are, appreciate your success and see where there is place for improvements and run with that -literally would be a good idea LOL ! The other day I was telling one trainer that I had ONLY lost 20 pounds so far..Then she brought me to the weights section of the gym and gave me a 20 pounds dumbbell to carry...the light went on!!! This is how much I am no longer carry on my, that was quite heavy! :-) I know now that I have to celebrate. I AM DOING IT!!!

Fallen-off the wagon, back on the train.

These last couple days have been tough. I have fallen off the wagon. I had chips, wings, etc...lots of junk. Why ? not sure why. It was a bit like I could since I had lost a bit. Stupid..I know!!!
Since Friday I kept saying" oh well , tomorrow I'll do better!

Not exactly what happened. But it's ok, TODAY I finally put a stop to all that and exercised.
I did a 5 K bike ride with the kids this morning (I have 2 kids). I wanted to establish a nice circuit I could do. Plus I did the same 5 K circuit after dinner but walking. Geeze it feels GOOD!!!! I felt tired and wondered if I would be able to finish at around 3 K. But I completed it. Next time I will time myself. Maybe I will challenge myself to always beat my time by at least a couple minutes every time. Higher the expectations , higher the results! :-) Life is good. I feel optimistic today.

Master Squat-er!!!!

I am a master at squats- I should say I have become- because it was not always the case. I remember the first ones my trainer had asked me to do...oh boy was it ever painful to watch and to do!!! My legs have become much stronger and can do them much easier. My trainer told me I was her best trainee at squats. Having studied motivation (my trainer that is) I think she specifically told me that to motivate me. She made me do squats as the first exercise of my routine. I think she wanted to motivate me and set the pace and mood for the rest of the training....In any case, it worked. Who likes to do things they suck at ??? Being successful made me happy so did being praise -I feel like a child saying that :-) LOL

In any case I am looking forward to do more. Next time: squats with 15 pounds on my shoulders. Beef cake!!!! Urgh!

I'm feeling good, I'm feeling happy and looking forward to tomorrow's training!!!

I think I finally get it !

I am happy and hopeful. I think I finally get it. I feel motivated. I don't find it hard to eat healthy and eat less. It actually feels good. I feel so much better. So energized and in such a better mood...and THAT is a very good thing my husband I am sure would say.LOL!

I still have cravings though for junk food once in a while, especially in the evening. As helpful and cooperative my husband is, he brought chips home tonight-my nemesis. Time for a glass of water I guess.

Life will be full of events where food may be a challenge. I have to learn how to cope with that.

Thank God for healthy days!

I have been sick for the past 4 days....The flu if you must know. This is not how I anticipated to lose a couple pounds. I am feeling better but not 100% I think I'm having a hard time digesting red meat....


I missed my first training session. I feel guilty, disappointed, defeated but NOT CONQUERED!!!!

I guess I just realized that life may get in the way but I must move on.
Today I have pulled out a pair of jeans - a too small pair of jeans....and to my great satisfaction they finally fit again!!!! A bit snug but I can button them up! Little steps little steps... :-)

Ok here's some new stats:

Pounds lost so far : 10 pounds

Inches lost:
******************
Arm: 0.25 "
Waist : 2.0"
Hips: 1.5"


I feel tempted to follow these crazy diets like Ideal Protein where you literally melt. I'm jealous of this friend of mine who is now so slim. My progress is so slow. I still train 3 times a week with my personal trainer, watch what I eat but do no particular diet. I average to 1 pound per week.

I guess I have some thinking to do...should I or not? Quick and easy or slow and painful?

Need a good kick in the arse today!!!

Any volunteer? I need a good kick in the arse today or at least a push so I can get my running shoes on and get my ass outside. It's nice and sunny today. I should have no excuse. But I am the master of excuses...It's usually too hot, too cold, too windy. Or I have house chores to do...Or the kids needs me or since I am a women there is always the good old excuse of having a headache!!!!

Although I am looking forward to my training tomorrow with my personal trainer; training on my own is quite difficult. Which is why I have decided to try with a personal trainer. I have tried everything. Weight watchers, Herbal magic, LA weight loss, Protein power, slim fast, name it...

But I must say, nothing has given me the result I am getting now. The weight loss is slow , but steady. The major change is in my mood. Since your mood, stress, etc can affect your weight loss, it is a vicious cycle. But I think I finally get it...

As hard as exercising can be, the more I force myself, the easiest it becomes and the more I feel like doing it...That being said, there are still days like today where I need to remember the feeling I get from exercising.Et voila!!!! Just thinking and writing about it and I feel like doing it...

Out for a good walk I go !

See ya :)

Family Pressure.

Every day we are faced with all kinds of pressure. Pressure from the boss at work, the boss at home ;-), pressure from coworkers and friends. But the worst case of pressure; the pressure that causes the most damage seems to come from family.

Family often has a way to make you do things that you would ordinarily say: "screw that!" Family has a hold on you! Some would say they hold you by the balls...but since I'm a women, I guess I can say that they hold me by the short and curlies!!!

All that to say that I'm stressed, my family has expectations that I'm not sure I can meet this time.......and what happens when I'm stressed? I tend to eat junk. i need to focus on something else.

I already took a nice hour walk. I try to have a minimum of exercise on the days I don't go to the gym. All I need to face now are the cravings that the stress is causing. It's a tough game.

Let's see how the evening goes...

Monday...What more to say!!!

This morning, and most of all day, I felt pretty blah.... I tried to suck it up though - because we all know that "big" girls don't cry ;-)
I did not feel like going to the gym. I was counting the hours. I was thinking: "I did not eat as good as I would have wanted this week-end, let myself go...so what's the point?" Why put myself through this much pain? I could just go home, relax and watch tv.

Around 11h30-lunchtime, something happened. Something that has never happened to me in all the years I have been working: I felt like going outside for some fresh air and for a WALK!!! Yes you read right LOL, a walk. So I did.

I have been exercising for 6 weeks now. Today was the beginning of my 7th week.
That makes 19- 1 hour session with a personal trainer completed...
89 sessions to go :-)

Something is definitely changing in me...come on I went for a walk because I felt like it!!!

So anyway, I went to the gym, sweat for an hour and 30 minutes.

• 15 minutes on the bike
• 1 hour of weights focusing on the legs
• 15 minutes on the bike again

Oh the pain I felt in my calves and still felt as I was walking up the 3 steps to my front porch...

But I feel great, I feel triumphant! I had some loud music on in my car for the drive home and sang and dance all the way! I am simply in a good mood.

Turelou!

I had a so-so week-end.
I over indulged a bit. I had friends over and wanted to treat them a little by cooking them delicious meals...which I did...which I ate as well.
I feel guilty. Feel like I may have scrapped all last week's efforts.
I must forget about it. Tomorrow is a new week.
Back to good eating habbit and TRAINING.
I must put lots of efforts this week and see if it gives me any results.
The stress in my life is preventing me from focussing and from being simply happy.

I guess Simple Joe can't simply be happy....

Selfish people

Since this blog will not only be used as a "log journal" but also as my personal diary I figured I may as well write in here all that is upsetting in my day in the goal of purging my life of all the negativity.

People are selfish...well most of the people of my family are...
People are alwyas looking for excuses. They talk in a way that is clear to me....they are trying to justify there actions. Their lazy selfish actions. Of course attending a family members friend funeral is no fun or being at the bed of your sick mother who barely recognizes you because of alzeihmer is not my idea of fun...but it is the RIGHT thing to do.

For some reasons which I would hope one day I can figure out, when a close person of mine is that selfish it affects me. I do know they are not me and that their actions do not reflect on who I am but it still affect me. It upsets me to the point it can ruin my entire day. Maybe because I have a hidden feeling of no control? Who knows. All I can say is that it is a terrible curse.

To all selfish people of the world who affectes other by their behavior : Fuck you!

Simply Joe

Hi,

This is my first attempt at blogging. Why am I doing it? I am still unsure of the reasons that have been motivating certain "life" changes of mine lately. I am overweight :-( I have started a training program with a very expensive personal trainer and thought I could share my feelings, progress, thoughts, fear, yadi yadi yada!!!

I am most likely gonna be using this blog more as a diary since I do not forsee anyone to be reading this. Why would you?

Ok...here's my stats:

287 lbs - a couple months ago.
283 lbs - start training with personal trainer
275 lbs -week 5

As for the rest, who I am, well what's the point...I know who I am! But do I really?

Simply Joe